Force Unleashed and Coffee with the man who sold it to me

Not much else to talk about really. I kinda like the Gamestop guy his names Dave. Buuut I have so much crap and baggage at the moment that I don't want date. Maybe when I finally get Medicaid so I can pay off my doctors bills, and get some actual treatment and feel a bit better. Okay then we'll see how I feel about dating. Grant you what I have I'll have for the rest of my life. Turns out it ties into a dormant birth defect I was born with that just up and finally manifested or something. I really have a hard time following most of my doctors. It's like they assume I went to med school or something. Thankfully my mom was a nurse and deciphers this stuff, so I do have an idea of what's wrong with me but I'm not going to go into it. I will say the pain is still a mystery but it's definitely something with my bones, and more than likely connected somehow to all this. But yes my bones aren't so good all signs point there. I need to see a rheumatologist when I get medicaid, because I can't afford it now. What nearly killed me was adrenal failure, also something with my pituitary links into this birth effect. It explains a lot actually though now that I know about it. But the adrenal failure was the biggy since my adrenal gland no longer functions as its supposed to and I need to take medication in order to live.

Christ this is depressing! I rather talk about the game I just got! Sorry Oblivion you'll have to wait yet again because the Force Unleashed is AWESOME!

I'll tell you Dezi I read your last news post on your site, and I do really want to open up more with you because prior to me becoming an ice blooded super cynic who views everyone as sh*t until proven otherwise that stuff used to upset me too. Well I've been a cynic since I was a teen, but it's only gotten worse, and worse, and worse. What irks me is it's not my nature to be like that. I'm actually a very kind person but you need those emotional self-defense mechanisms or people in general will just wear you down. These days I don't care anymore about most people because I accept most people, the human race in general are a bunch of... Well you get my drift, I mean I could type something huge about my thoughts on things, I even posted something vaguely along those lines in that old photograph thread, which seems to be gone now. However to cover such a vast topic would basically be a long essay.

Back to the point, with me because I have severe trust issues it takes time for me to open up about stuff. What you do know about me as wild as it is, believe it or not is only scratching the surface. Not even scratching more like gently tapping it once. I'll just say I've lead a very strange life, and I have my reasons for why I behave the way I do at times in the context of distancing myself. It takes a while to get to know me well, especially online because it's ONLINE. I mean pretty self explanatory there.